DEAR ABBY: I actually have been in a relationship for nearly five years and I consider that “nothing is constant except change.”
I survive a hard and fast income. I try to manage my spending, but I find yourself moving into arguments because I don't find the money for for things.
My partner has perfected the art of spending other people's money, including mine, which I consider selfish.
Any suggestions to resolve these money problems?
DEAR ALL WHO CHOOSE MONEY: You and your partner have very different values with regards to funds.
This is certainly one of the problems that almost all often results in couples breaking up. (Others are politics, sex, religion, and child-rearing.) My suggestion: end the connection before this person drives you out of business.
DEAR ABBY: I’m a male scientist at a big university. Four years ago, I used to be surprised to receive an email from someone I had been friends with a few years ago when he was a postdoctoral fellow in our department.
We were good friends back then, but when he moved east and gave up his research, we lost touch. Today he works in computer security.
After he reconnected, we resumed our friendship through regular phone calls and emails.
Two years ago, while I used to be visiting my family on the east coast, he invited me to spend the day with him and his wife (who I had never met before). Since my family lives near him, I accepted the offer and spent a really nice day with them at their home.
Abby, I never heard from him again! After sending him and his wife several emails and a postcard thanking them for his or her kind hospitality, there was silence since then.
We are each Jewish, by the way in which, as is his wife. In the years before he got back in contact with me, he became Orthodox and devout, which is just not the case with me.
Any ideas as to what is occurring and what I can possibly do about it?
I doubt your lack of religiosity had anything to do with it. Perhaps his wife refused further contact. Since he never explained why he withdrew, you could never know.
But as things stand, I don't think there's anything you’ll be able to do about it. If you hear from him in a number of years, be happy to ask him.
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