I've found that we will learn lots from cats, the embodiment of our human soul, about methods to use email to our advantage.
I send a whole lot of emails. Too many emails. I also respond immediately when others send me an email. And truthfully, I write limitless emails.
While one might assume that this over-responsiveness is a superb thing—implying loyalty to family and friends and knowledgeable attitude in business—the truth is that the effect of being an over-responsive jerk is perversely negative. In personal and skilled settings, an excessively friendly and chatty email personality can have the alternative of the intended effect.
Like it or not, relationships are about power, influence, and advantage. In face-to-face conversations, verbal and nonverbal communication is commonly about positioning yourself in relation to others so you may achieve your goals and boost your self-esteem. That doesn't mean we’ve to be jerks. But confidence is definitely essential when presenting ourselves.
Strangely, power dynamics play out in another way in email. Since there isn’t any physical presence and no spoken words, power is expressed through restraint.
When considering the dynamics of email relationships, you could have noticed that the one who often seems to have the advantage is the one who’s probably the most distant. The one who replies as an alternative of taking the initiative. The one who replies slowly as an alternative of quickly. The one who uses fewer words as an alternative of more.
The effect is to convey relative indifference. People who initiate email conversations may respond immediately and be overly verbose of their email threads, expressing a potentially overly eager desire to please.
To use email to your advantage, you need to realize that it shouldn’t be only a communication tool. It is a tactic and part of a bigger presentation strategy.
I'm not suggesting that you need to never initiate conversations with other people. Nor am I suggesting that you just don't respond with appropriate speed, or that your responses are so choppy that you just sound harsh or unkind. Obviously, all relationships are ultimately about give and take. You can't meet the needs of others without having a caring, concerned personality.
But there's a flip side to email, especially. In the absence of nonverbal cues and tonal signals, it becomes much more essential to convey confidence and a professionally crafted air of royalty in email relationships. There's just an excessive amount of opportunity for people to misinterpret your intentions and way of thinking. So it’s worthwhile to continuously balance these two goals in your email interactions – being caring and accommodating while also projecting confidence and dignity.
Try this exercise. Think of the reactions of individuals sending emails as dogs or cats react to their owners. Dogs bond with their owners, love attention, wag their tails, jump around, bark happily, follow their owners across the house, lick their owners, and customarily make it clear 24/7 how much they love and wish their owners.
Consider whether you might be a dog or a cat in your email conversations. I'm a dog attempting to develop into a cat. If you’re thinking that you're a cat, don't worry. However, when you recognize dog-like traits in your communication style, consider how you may adopt more of a “cat” personality.
image credit : www.mercurynews.com
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