DEAR ABBY: I just said goodbye to my third beloved pet. Although it got easier with time, each death was devastating and I actually have grieved deeply over their loss.
My father's time is approaching, but I feel no sadness.
I had a loving relationship with my parents, but not like a few of my friends who described their parents as their rock or their best friends.
I'm nervous that something is missing in my heart and I should feel the loss of individuals greater than the lack of pets. Please help me understand this. I don't feel good.
DEAR MOURNER: Please accept my condolences for the lack of your pet and please stop beating yourself up on your feelings (or lack thereof).
Everyone grieves in a different way. It's possible that you simply were only able to just accept your mother's death since you stopped interacting together with her on the emotional level that your folks did with their parents. The same could also be true on your father.
Their pets, alternatively, were a day by day source of emotional support. Sometimes pets develop into children, and the lack of that “child” will be more painful than the loss of oldsters.
DEAR ABBY: My friend “Gene” and I actually have been friends since elementary school. We at the moment are in our 50s. We were inseparable best friends for a few years.
When we were about 30, I noticed that our friendship appeared to be a one-way street because he made no effort to make contact.
Gene was friendly and courteous once I called him, but he never called me. Instead, he focused on friends he may gain advantage from professionally and withdrew from old friends like me. About 20 years ago, I finished calling him and decided to show to other friends who were more personable and polite.
I can count on one hand the variety of times I've seen or spoken to Gene over the past decade, but today I received an invite to his son's graduation party, who wants a monetary gift for his highschool graduation.
Abby, his son wouldn't recognize me if I tapped him on the shoulder. To say I used to be horrified could be an understatement.
I don't feel any obligation to send money to someone I don't know, especially considering how Gene ended our decades-long friendship years ago.
How can I handle this tactfully without appearing rude or bitter?
DEAR SHOCKED: The polite approach to take care of this could be to send the young man a greeting card and need him all the perfect.
DEAR HOPE NOT: Those who come to the celebrations mustn’t come empty-handed. Of course, a present is a must.
However, in case you paid generously on your relative's first two weddings, your third gift just must be something modest that you think that the couple might like.
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