DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend of three years recently proposed to me. The problem is that his great uncle jilted my great aunt within the Seventies.
This shouldn't matter to the present situation because it was many years ago and I barely know my great aunt. She didn't even know my fiancé's name until the last family reunion when I discussed our engagement and my future last name.
She freaked out and demanded that he leave her house! She told me to not marry him and said his family was all the time the identical.
I don't like my great aunt very much, but after this controversy, her children and siblings are threatening to shun me if I marry him.
The wedding is in five months and I'm torn. Family is essential to me and although I'm not very near her, I even have made it a goal to be closer to her children (my cousins) and other relatives as I become older.
I do know that what happened to her has hurt her loads, but I believe her request is outrageous. What should I do? Should I postpone the marriage?
LOVE PAST DRAMA: Let me get this straight. Your great aunt tried to steer a young man to marry her by claiming she would have his child. Did she have the infant and was the daddy's paternity ever established?
If your fiancé's great uncle gets wind of the incontrovertible fact that he’s being falsely accused and that your great aunt not only doesn't love him but in addition wants to present him financial advantage, who can blame him for running away? I actually can't.
You must now resolve whether to interrupt off your engagement together with your fiancé (whom you most likely know and love well after three years) or give in to the emotional blackmail of your unethical great aunt.
I do know what I’d do. This may very well be your likelihood to interrupt the curse.
DEAR ABBY: After a social event, I come home and take into consideration what I said or didn't say. Did I behave accurately? I worry and do these “checks” again and again in my mind. It's painful.
The social occasion may very well be lunch with a friend, a phone call, or a celebration. I've been doing this for years and it's exhausting.
Why am I doing this? And more importantly, how can I stop?
A licensed psychotherapist can make it easier to to alleviate the obsessive thoughts which might be troubling you. Your doctor or medical insurance company can refer you.
DEAR READERS: I join tens of millions of Americans observing this Memorial Day in praying thanks for those brave men and ladies who sacrificed their lives in service to our country. May they rest in peace. —
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